If power play with your partner turns you on, you probably already enjoy spicing things up in the bedroom with a bit of BDSM. We’ve all seen 50 Shades of Grey, right? Many couples swear by the benefits of BDSM, and enjoy that it brings them closer to their partners and takes their intimacy to orgasmic new levels. The feeling of total domination or vulnerable submission can be thrilling – and all you need are the best BDSM toys to truly enhance the experience.This article focuses on the use of BDSM toys to destigmatize the use of them in relationship. Many people are often to shy to express their BDSM desires to their partners. Therefore, we aim to help not just couple, but also singles. However, if you want to iuntroduce sex toys into your life, you can learn more about them on Bedbible.com.
What are BDSM toys?
BDSM toys come in many varieties and genres, from sex slings to restraint kits. In the practice of BDSM, there is typically one submissive partner and one dominant partner, usually referred to in kink communities as dom/subs. BDSM toys are typically used for the following:
- Restraining the submissive partner
- Blindfolding the submissive partner
- Suspending the submissive partner
- Using a chastity device on the submissive partner
- Tantalising the partner and edging the submissive partner (edging is a process of delaying and denying the submissive partner an orgasm over and over to heighten the eventual big O!)
What are the best BDSM toys?
To enhance your bedroom power play, you should experiment with some of the best BDSM toys on the market: from sex swings to the best BDSM anal toys, there will be a toy out there guaranteed to spice up your sex life. Some of the most popular toys based on reviews are followed below:
Spreader Bars
Spreader bars are typically used to restrain the submissive partner: this BDSM toy keeps the legs apart for easy penetration whilst also functioning as a piece of bondage kit. Spreader bars come in leather, steel or even soft silky velvet, so even if you’re not sold on the leather-look BDSM concept, you can enjoy incorporating a spreader bar into your sex life.
Gags, blindfolds and bondage kits
Inject some spontaneity into the bedroom with a bit of bondage! Whether you like to be blindfolded or tied up by your partner (or vice versa) bondage adds a real “unknown” dimension into the bedroom – the submissive partner will enjoy the thrills of not knowing what comes next. Make sure to have a safe word when engaging in bondage play, so that you and your partner can build confidence and trust as you explore your fantasies.
Sex slings and swings
Sex slings and sex swings are the best BDSM toys (rather, BDSM equipment) for those who already have a bit of BDSM experience. Sex swings can truly intensify pleasure for both parties: not only will you be able to engage in deeper penetrative sex (if that’s what you’re into!), you will also be able to try out a multitude of creative positions, and enhance the positions that you already love. Whether the submissive partner is attached to a door with a door sling or suspended in a swing, this BDSM toy will truly take your power play to the next level.
Anal Hooks
One of the best BDSM anal toys, anal hooks let you and your partner explore bondage and restraint in an even more intense way: the anal hook can restrict the submissive partner’s movements, leaving them at the mercy of their dom! This toy is not particularly beginner-friendly, and should only be used in a relationship where both parties fully consent to the practice. Again, make sure to employ a safe word.
Collars
Fashion-accessory-turned-BDSM-toy, collars can be worn in the bedroom to establish a thrilling hierarchy: some submissives even find it romantic to wear a collar, as it symbolises their total submission to their partner. Collars can also be adapted for bondage use, as you can attach chains and other restraint equipment to a BDSM-friendly collar.
How to use BDSM toys
There is no one-size-fits-all when it comes to BDSM toys: everyone’s fantasies and sexual desires are different. However, there are some basic BDSM principles that you can follow to help you kickstart your power play adventure the right way:
Listen to your partner
BDSM relationships are built on trust and confidence: it’s important to never override your partner’s limits, even in the name of BDSM domination. This is why safe words exist: agree on a safe word to use when the submissive partner is at their limit, and always respect it.
Get spontaneous
The best thing about adding some BDSM into the bedroom is the “unknown” factor: the submissive partner doesn’t always know what’s coming, and that’s exciting! Get creative when using your BDSM toys and don’t always just stick to one piece of kit: there are plenty of BDSM toys on the market designed to bring every fantasy or sexy scenario to life. From BDSM anal toys to chastity devices, BDSM doesn’t always have to involve bondage! Try to always buy the best BDSM toys from high-quality sex toy retailers, especially if you’re a beginner.
Explore your fantasies
The great thing about BDSM is that it lets partners explore their wildest sexual fantasies together, becoming closer as a couple whilst enjoying their intimacy. If you’re going to experiment with some BDSM toys, use this as an opportunity to discuss other fantasies or role-play adventures that you’d love to explore with your partner. BDSM toys also make it easier to fulfil most fantasies: for example, if you always fantasized about being attached to the bed whilst blindfolded, adding some BDSM toys such as a spreader or tickler device will greatly enhance the experience!
Benefits of using BDSM toys
Whilst BDSM won’t be for everyone, those who love it swear by its benefits and the positive role it’s played in their relationship. Some benefits of adding BDSM into the bedroom include:
- Reduced levels of stress – studies have found that those who practice BDSM often enjoy the same endorphins-rush that an intense workout might offer, which in turn reduces the production of stress hormones in the body and positively impacts their overall wellbeing.
- Better communication – many couples fall apart due to a lack of communication, but practising BDSM can actually enhance you and your partner’s ability to communicate! With the practice of safe words, BDSM couples develop a natural receptivity to their partner’s needs, and become less inhibited about asking for what they want.
- Trust and Confidence – couples who practice consensual BDSM often have an easier time trusting their partner. It takes real vulnerability to engage in BDSM activities, so the natural bond between partners during intimacy is magnified and intensified. It also can lead to better sex overall, as both partners learn to ask for what they want.
Verdict?
Incorporating BDSM toys into the bedroom can be a great way to intensify your relationship, deepen your emotional connection and truly get what you want out of your intimate time. From BDSM anal toys to sexy black restraint kits, there are plenty of BDSM toys on the market to kickstart your power-play journey. However, you should always have your partner’s consent, because as great as BDSM toys and playing can be, it will be an equally bad experience, if one part does not really want to do it.